Period+4+Diehl

Jesus Christ

- **__Basic Information__** o Current City: Jerusalem o Hometown: Nazareth o Sex: I believe in abstinence. o Birthday: December 25, 0 B.C. o Political Views: Theocracy o Religious Views: I'm the savior, LOL o Bio: Basically I’m the HMOC (Head Man On Campus). I run the world, literally. I was born on December 25th (Christmas), and everything just flew from there. I grew up in Nazareth, then moved to Jerusalem. My parents, Mary and David, are so supportive they always backed my religious work. Well flash forward to now and I walked on water a few times, turned water into wine, ran a spirit out of a crazy man. You name it I did it. Now I’m in the business of saving people, doesn’t matter who, prostitutes, nobles, liars, robbers, murderers. Whoever needs help, I’m there for you man. I was actually put on Earth just for you (the people of the world). The big man (God) sent me down to fix a few things up. I was all like “Yo what's up I’m here to save you.” and you guys were kind of all like “AHHHH, kill him!” and crucified me. But whatever no hard feelings I’m just trying to spread the message that I FORGIVE YOU. No matter what you do, if your truly sorry you are cool with me. So about the whole heaven thing, get on my good side or else you’ll be chillin’ for eternity in H-E double hockey sticks. HAHA JK, everyone is on my good side if you except me as your best friend, and savior. Oh right, I rose on Easter just like I said I would, no big deal. Now I’m just hanging out, hoping that the world lives in my name and lives peacefully and righteously. Turns out a whole book was written about me and all the stuff I said. Check it out some time, I promise it will be the best decision you ever make! Remember W.W.J.D. (What Would Jesus Do). Peace and Love.

o Favorite Quotations: Romans 6:13 "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." - **__Relationships__** o Mother: Mary o Father: Joseph o Daughters: Every girl o Sons: Every boy o Brothers: none o Sisters: none - **__Likes and Interest__** o Activities: Saving people, preaching, healing, loving o Interests:God, people o Music: Psalms and Halleluah by Jeff Buckley o Books: The Bible o Movies: Passion of the Christ o Television: American Idol - **__Education and Work__** o High School: None o College/University: None o Employer: God

ALBUM 1:** Good Times on Earth **
 * __Photos__** ** (15 photos; 5 in each album)
 * ALBUM 2: Ouch rough day!

ALBUM 3: Hop off Haterz, I'm Back! __Groups__ - EXPLANATION: I joined this in spite. Obviously the Muslim religion is wack compared to Christianity. I, Jesus Christ, am the savior. GROUP 2: MyChickenSoup - EXPLANATION: I joined this group because it preached a message of love and compassion. It is centered on me and tells followers to love me. By joining this group I support myself. GROUP 3: JesusComigo - EXPLANATION: It a spanish site all about me, how awesome is that! I'm basically showing my love for all no matter what their race. Mexican, Irish, Asians, Caucasians, I love them all. GROUP 4: FocusonJesus - EXPLANATION: This is a weight loss support group centered around me. It is an honor that they find inspiration from me. I love these ladies cause after all the body is a temple! GROUP 5: dreamsfromHim - EXPLANATION: This group is designed for people to express spiritual and prophetic dreams. It is dreams all about me. Although I think most of them are making the dreams up it is still pretty sweet. GROUP 6: Jesus Theway - EXPLANATION: It should come as no surprise to anyone that I am the man. I am the light and tour guide through life. This group is asking for answers and I'm gonna give it to them. GROUP 7: LDSsingleadult - EXPLANATION: This is a church group that is dedicated to following my teachings. For God's sake (no pun intended) they named the church after me. It is pretty flattering to have it named for me. GROUP 8: FamilyofGod - EXPLANATION: This group is really high on my list. They believe that God is the only way. They believe that my father is also their father. GROUP 9: Devil May Cry - EXPLANATION: I really hate this group. I'm not really sure why anyone would want to be in this group. These people need Jesus in their life. GROUP 10: Emailministry - EXPLANATION: This group uses email chains to promote Christianity. This is what I'm talking about. Using technology to worship me.
 * GROUP 1: Islam4al l

__Quizzes__** - RESULTS: Pocahontas. - EXPLANATION: Pocahontas is very spiritually involved with nature. She really respects my creations, and shows John Smith not to hate on me. Basically me and her are pretty dang similar! QUIZ 2: How should you spend your summer? - RESULTS: Passion and the love. - EXPLANATION: It's all about the love baby! That is me in a nutshell spreading love, receiving love, you name something about love and I'm all about it. Come on now passion? Have you seen Mel Gibson's Passion of the Christ? I am the picture of passion. QUIZ 3: What kind of swimsuit are you? - RESULTS: Bikini. - EXPLANATION: With my bod I can rock anything. It also helps to show the people all my scars from the crucifixion. If they see the scars they can tell all that I gave up for them. QUIZ 4: What TV show should you be in? - RESULTS: Glee. - EXPLANATION: Glee, gosh that is my show! It's just like the olden days when the prostitutes, murderers, and robbers were getting picked on and I came in and saved them. These kids are low on the totem pole, but all they need is a little JC (Jesus Christ) QUIZ 5: What superhero are you? - RESULTS: Spiderman. - EXPLANATION**: I shoot webs like spidey all day long. Maybe mine are metaphorical webs to get everyone to hear me preach, but still webs none the less. With all his spider infection he's a guy that could really use some praying.
 * QUIZ 1: Which Cartoon are you?

Works Cited: //The Bible//. New York: American Bible Society, 1995. Print. Common Era Version.